Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Universal Heal All: Give God your Money


Babies are ill and starving in Africa.  There is child slavery all throughout the United States.  Homeless people can’t get out of poverty.  Women everywhere are degraded as prostitutes.  Drug addicts’ are biologically addicted to their drugs.  How do we solve this?  We give money to the Church.  God will take your money and appreciate that you’re heating the Priest’s home and providing him meals and a God-given jaguar to roll into church.  Visiting Africa and spending time with children and setting up hospitals to aid the commonwealth of the African population would be futile.  No.  We don’t resolve an issue by addressing it firsthand.  We simply give me gas money to fuel my modest Jaguar and God will appreciate that so much that he will cure the people who he wants to cure.  Think to yourself, “I really want love to be everywhere and illness to vanish” five times daily, and if you really mean it, God will listen.  He is listening clearly.  That’s why there is any love in the world.  It doesn’t come from individuals; it comes from another being’s inspiration planted in your life to inspire you to love.  That’s why I just made my plush seats leather.  He answered your prayers and efforts to cure ailments in Africa when you donated to God.  Clicking your heels three times and saying “theres no place like home” for the sake of child slaves everywhere is great and God will love you for this.  Closing your eyes in a quiet place and putting your hands over your heart with a solemn expression will in fact rewire society for every beneficial purpose, as well as reaching in your pocket and giving God your money.  

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